Into the Horizon.

Day 93. Do you look to the future more with anticipation or fear?

 

The future is a blur. It is a mystery. It is love. It is adventure. It is sex. It is life yet to be seen.  I go on living with that prospect . The unknown used to incite fear because of the possibilities, and now it is invigorating for the same reason. Even with no guarantee that I will have a future, I still look forward to what may happen if I get there.

Perhaps it is merely a change in what I may be able to do in the time to come. Working to develop on many fronts for no clear purpose; it may not even exist yet.

The next chapters are rough sketches. One may turn into my masterpiece while the others don’t quite work out. Right now it’s just broad strokes, but with a little more work, the angles, the form, the narrative, the process all get clearer. That’s what it is to make something from nothing.

I have stopped worrying about making mistakes or taking a little more time to get something done. Who ever said faster was better, lied. When it comes to making plans, making moves, and making art, the more time given to make them great could mean a better outcome. Or at least a fruitful one. If you can accept the possibility of failure before setting out, there it no reason to fear the worst. That is probably easier said than done, but it means the freedom to try and fail and not give up.

I look forward with hope, knowing that the reality of it will be different than I imagine it now. The future is the only frontier we can’t fully predict or anticipate. No matter what technology we have in our hands in the present, we don’t know what comes next.

The story is still being written, but I anticipate cliff-hangers, surprise appearances, love and heartbreak, sex, and many vast horizons to explore and adore.